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Arsenic and Old Lace

Aunt Martha: "For a gallon of elderberry wine, I take one teaspoon full of arsenic, then add half a teaspoon full of strychnin, and then just a pinch of cyanide."

Mortimer: "Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops."

Mortimer: "There's a body in the windowseat!"
Aunt Abby: "Yes, dear. We know."

Mortimer: "Men don't just get into windowseats and die!"
Aunt Martha: "No, dear. He died first."
Mortimer: "How did he die?"
Aunt Abby: "The gentleman died because he drank some wine with poison in it."


Page last updated 8/1/04